2025-26 Preview Haikus, East Edition

We are officially one week from the start of the 2025-26 season. One measly week (give or take two days) before the horrors of an NBA-less summer are behind us!

Some of you may have wondered about the name “Basketball Poetry.” It is not a pompous ode to the elegance of my prose, nor is it a nod to the idea that basketball is poetry (although I certainly lean into the latter ambiguity when I talk with strangers).

It is, in fact, an unfortunately literal name. The seeds of this blog were started more than a decade ago, when I penned my first set of team preview haikus before the 2012-13 season (as a Facebook status, no less; if that’s not some boomer sh*t, I don’t know what is).

Thankfully, those initial efforts have been lost to time and digital erosion. Regrettably, I’ve typed up a new set of poems every year since.

These are typically my least-loved posts, but it’s tradition! Like green bean casserole for Thanksgiving, nobody wants more haikus, but it’s hard to imagine a turkey feast without it.

To add a little analytical meat, I pair each poem with a key question. Squads are presented in reverse order of my expected regular-season standings, although don’t expect much accuracy. How does one predict where the Philadelphia 76ers end up?

You’ll have a year to recover from my assault on your aesthetic sensibilities; for now, prepare to suffer. If you’ve got the poetry bug yourself, please show your skills in the comments! I love it when people drop a few lines.

Quick programming note: The Western Conference haikus will be published sometime early next week. After that, we’ll have glorious new basketball to discuss.

Brooklyn Nets

Tug of war for shots
Basketball fingerpainting
Tank, or abstract art?

Key Question: When will the rookies get to shine?

It’s pretty rare to see an owner so plainly state their intentions, but it’s not like anyone doesn’t know the gameplan in Brooklyn. The Nets plan to lose often and lose big.

There isn’t zero talent in Brooklyn, as Nic Claxton, Michael Porter Jr., and Cam Thomas are starter-caliber players. And the Nets have plenty of others who could be at least fringe rotation guys for real teams: Haywood Highsmith, Terance Mann, Noah Clowney, Day’Ron Sharpe, etc.

The Nets will want to showcase some of their vets as potential trade bait, but they’ll also need to carve out playing time for their five (!) first-round picks.

Don’t be surprised if we see less of the rookies than you might expect early on, but I do not doubt that when February rolls around, the basketball will become fascinatingly unwatchable.

Washington Wizards

Sarr roars, springs up, and
Mashes the defender. Dunks,
Then wakes up; a dream.

Key Question: How good is Alex Sarr?

Sarr enters his second year as a bit of a mystery box. He had stretches when he was banging threes and swatting shots where you could see a faint, glimmering outline of a horn on his head. But an inability to handle contact on either side of the ball dramatically limited his upside. Watch as Orlando Robinson — not a titan of post scoring — shoulders Sarr out of the way almost from one side of the restricted area to the other:

Just 20 years old, Sarr will look to prove that he can be the unicorn the Wizards hoped he’d become when they drafted him second overall. His skill base is already there, but Sarr needs to convert some of his athletic potential into kinetic reality. It starts with simply being stronger, something most players this age naturally improve.

I like a lot of the Wizards’ young players, particularly fellow sophomore Kyshawn George. But nobody else has the two-way upside of Sarr.

Charlotte Hornets

Stare into the void
Long enough, a one-leg three
Stares right back at you

Key Question: Is it Miller time?

I’m fascinated by Brandon Miller.

Miller possesses excellent shotmaking skills, but he never gets to the rim. I haven’t figured out yet if he can’t, or if he won’t — two very different problems that both lead to disappointing efficiency numbers. He’s also had some fantastic defensive flashes undermined by frustrating young-player inconsistency.

The biggest problem is that he can’t stay healthy. The Hornets need Miller to grow into an All-Star-caliber player, someone who can play effectively both on and off the ball. He has a lot of improvements to make to get there, but simply being on the court is the first step.

Philadelphia 76ers

Does anyone know
More about tendons and bones
Than a Philly fan?

Key Question: How much do a healthy Paul George and Joel Embiid have left?

Injuries are the ever-present concern with the Sixers, but even a healthy Paul George and Joel Embiid have questions. George is 35, and Embiid is 31. They’d be past their athletic prime even without the more than a dozen surgeries the pair have cumulatively had.

Last year, both stars had their least efficient shooting seasons ever (relative to league average). They were never really 100% physically, but it’s rare to see guys their age make significant improvements as they get older.

Peculiarly for a team like this, Philly has a really fun (if somewhat overlapping) group of young players waiting in the wings. It’s easy to suggest the 76ers should lean into a rebuild, but Joel Embiid has four years left on his contract, and George has three (both with player options in the last year). There won’t be an easy way to get off either player.

The Sixers’ ceiling is the third seed, but their floor is bottom-three in the conference. At this point, it’s hard to be optimistic.

Indiana Pacers

Dusk gloom settles in
Cloudy twilight, no stars seen
Hope, brighter morrow

Key Question: What do they get from their centers?

I was tempted to write more about Bennedict Mathurin, but we’ve already talked about his struggles to find a new path to greatness. I haven’t spent as much time discussing Indiana’s worrisome center rotation.

Isaiah Jackson is an athleticism-dependent lob threat coming off an Achilles injury. Jay Huff is a fun 3-and-D(unk) center who struggles tremendously with post defense (shotblocking aside) and on the boards, and he lost his role in Memphis’ rotation last year. Tony Bradley and James Wiseman have their strengths, but neither has proven to be a starting-quality big man in the NBA thus far.

And those four guys won’t even have 48 minutes available to them. The Pacers will lean into smallball with Obi Toppin at center, and it wouldn’t shock me if guys like Pascal Siakam or even Jarace Walker (typically a three) get occasional minutes there. Injuries to Tyrese Haliburton and TJ McConnell have also made the team remarkably thin at point guard. Add it all up, and rostering four below-average true centers becomes difficult.

I have no idea how the rotation shakes out; I’m not sure coach Rick Carlisle does, either. Perhaps, for a team that traded for its own draft pick, the uncertainty is a feature, not a bug.

Toronto Raptors

If the color tan
Could be a basketball team
It would be the Raps

Key Question: How do Brandon Ingram and Scottie Barnes look together?

I don’t want to take away too much until the games matter, but Ingram looks healthy and productive. Barnes has had some awesome defensive moments, but he’s also 3-for-17 from the floor in his two preseason appearances, which have been even more jumper-heavy than his usual shot diet.

The Raptors have been a painfully brutal watch for several years now. Ingram is supposed to be the catalyst that opens things up. Coach Darko Rajakovic’s number-one offseason task was to figure out how to integrate his two offensive tentpoles. If the Raptors are finally to make some postseason noise, they’ll have to be more than the sum of their parts.

Chicago Bulls

Billy Donovan
Hired back in 2020
Third-longest tenure

Key Question: What is Josh Giddey’s ceiling?

Is “hired” one syllable, or two? Ok, so not my best haiku, but I just really wanted people to know that Billy Donovan has been with his team longer than any coach in the NBA except Erik Spoelstra and Steve Kerr. He was hired in September 2020. That’s wild. Given his history of secret extensions, Billy Donovan will likely be a Bull for the foreseeable future.

Anyway, uh, where was I?

Josh Giddey, right! Giddey was explosive down the stretch of 2025, averaging darn close to a triple-double and shooting lights-out from downtown on limited volume. That stretch roughly coincided with the absences of Zach LaVine (trade) and Lonzo Ball (injury), but late-season basketball always needs to be taken with a grain of salt.

That said, he showcased real improvements with his physicality and shooting. No, he’s not ever going to be the best or second-best player on a title contender. But given the Bulls’ magnetism for mediocrity, at least Giddey is a fun guy to watch with room for growth.

I can’t wait to see the one-for-one swap Chicago pulls off for Coby White.

Boston Celtics

Battered and alone
Licking their wounds with rough tongue
Celtics bide their time

Key Question: How hard do they push?

I’ve already talked about the reasons why I think a Celtics playoff push is more than possible, but we need to acknowledge the reality. Even an early Tatum return won’t have this team sniffing contender status; is the team better off shutting down Derrick White and Jaylen Brown in February to try and nab a lottery pick?

Frankly, the East is mediocre enough that it might be hard to fall out of the top-10 entirely. Is submarining Boston’s winning culture worth a 3% chance at the top pick and a likely selection in the 10-ish range as opposed to, like, 15th? I genuinely don’t know.

The rational move is to stealth tank, and Brad Stevens has been nothing if not rational throughout his tenure. Put a pin in this one for now.

Miami Heat

Spo breathes in, exhales
Fresh air, salt sprays. Rudder turns
Tacking against wind

Key Question: What dish can Spoelstra cook up?

I’ve written a ton about the Heat recently, so let’s keep this short.

Without Jimmy Butler, Miami is looking for a new direction. Coaches delight in taking a mishmash of ingredients and turning them into something delicious. They all want to be Iron Chefs. Spoelstra would never admit it, but he must be all tingly inside, getting to tinker around with a lineup facing less pressure and lower expectations.

The Heat will be weirder this season, and weirder is always more fun.

Milwaukee Bucks

We’re about to test
The upper limits of what
One player can do

Key Question: Can any guards play up to Antetokounmpo’s standard?

Giannis Antetokounmpo and Myles Turner are an excellent big-man combination, but the talent level starts to fall off dramatically after that. I have no idea what Milwaukee will get from Kyle Kuzma, but my expectations are pretty low. And the guards, whom I’ve written about previously, all have pretty defined strengths and weaknesses that will make it challenging to find the right two-way units.

That said, there is a decent amount of shooting on this roster. The Bucks led the league in three-point percentage last season, and the Giannis plus spacing combo has almost always led to scoring success. If Kevin Porter Jr. plays like he did for Milwaukee last season, and AJ Green or Ryan Rollins improve a bit, they could flirt with a top-five offensive ranking (which they narrowly missed last season). The defense could be okay if they had anybody who could guard a big wing, but they don’t, so it won’t.

As always, it feels like so much is riding on Antetokounmpo’s cannonball shoulders. He’s got enough deltoid strength to carry this team into the lower playoff mix by himself, but if he misses even 20 games, Milwaukee could be drawing dead.

Atlanta Hawks

The best way to play
Is the best way to get paid
Go win some games, Trae

Key Question: What does an optimized Trae Young look like?

For all the excitement that I have about Atlanta after a superb offseason, the fundamental question with this team remains unchanged: What does the best version of Trae Young look like?

We got closer to that last season, but even as his defense and off-ball play improved, his three-pointer abandoned him, and his turnovers crept up. Haliburton is proof that you can be an excellent passer without terrible turnovers. Young must cut out some of his sloppiest:

Young has never had this much surrounding two-way talent (even if Atlanta might be a liiiittle light on shooting), and it’s been a few seasons since the Hawks carried real expectations, too. Trae Young will get a lot of money from somebody, but his play this season could easily swing his next contract by mid-eight digits. Nobody will be impressed by 11 assists or 25 points per game; now, it’ll be about proving he can play winning basketball.

I love it when incentives are so perfectly aligned for everyone.

Detroit Pistons

Elbows, forearm shivs
Chirping like an angry bird
The Bad Boys are back!

Key Question: What can Ausar Thompson do on offense?

My love for the Thompson twins is vast, even if I have zero confidence in them ever developing a workable three-pointer. I picked Amen Thompson as my Defensive Player of the Year last season, and Ausar (who didn’t qualify for awards because he only played 59 games) might be even better.

But he’s a step behind Amen offensively. Ausar will need to continue to improve as a cutter, pick-setter, and ballhandler to maximize his obscene athletic gifts and become a stronger asset on offense.

Scoring-wise, Amen was able to develop a floater and a short jumper, providing a counter to his explosive drives to the hoop. Ausar will need to add those to his bag.

I couldn’t be higher on Ausar, but his path to success is far from guaranteed. If he wants to be more than an NBA blogboi fetish, he’ll have a lot of work to do. This season, the Pistons will command a far greater share of the spotlight. It’s time for Ausar to shine.

Orlando Magic

Insanity, cured?
Even a battering ram
Needs a break sometimes

Key Question: I’m tired of asking, but will anyone on the Magic make a three-pointer?

The Magic have tried so many times to construct a capable offense without having any shooters. They’ve maximized what you can do without any spacing, but that’s not really saying much!

With Desmond Bane, Tyus Jones, and rookie Jase Richardson, and perhaps some internal shooting improvement from Paolo Banchero, Franz Wagner, Jalen Suggs, and Wendell Carter, the hope is that the Magic have at least a little more room to operate.

If this isn’t the year Orlando breaks out of the bottom 10 in offense, it might never happen.

New York Knicks

Big hopes, big changes
Big lights and big, big pressure
Big Apple dreamin’

Key Question: Can OG Anunoby make an All-Star leap?

I’ve talked about the Mike Brown effect a million times already, and the New York media machine has amply covered the Josh Hart/Deuce McBride/Mitchell Robinson three-way battle to be the team’s fifth-most-important player.

But an OG Anunoby leap might truly make or break New York’s postseason aspirations.

Anunoby, 28, had a strong offensive year last season, one that blossomed in the time that Jalen Brunson missed due to injury. In 16 games without the star point guard, Anunoby averaged 23 points while shooting 49% from the field and 39% from deep (and getting to the line more than five times per game, something that he’s typically been unable to do).

Anunoby has often been described as a robotic offensive player, which is increasingly unfair. He’s become a relatively well-rounded scorer. He’s big enough to abuse smaller defenders, a versatile three-point shooter (he shot at least 36% from both wings and both corners), and quick enough to feed defenders dust on close-outs. We only saw flashes of him on-ball, but they were intriguing:

New York needs a little bit more variety on offense from the non-Brunson, non-Towns players on the roster. While Bridges is a little more comfortable with the ball than Anunoby, OG’s physical tools, cutting, and elite finishing may give him a leg up in Brown’s offense. We’ll find out soon enough.

Cleveland Cavaliers

Sleepwalking till March
Autopilot destruction
Can stars shine brighter?

Key Question: Can the stars level up?

The Cavs should steamroll through the regular season, and another 60-win season is in play even with Cleveland focusing solely on playoff success. Said success hinges almost entirely on the abilities of Darius Garland, Donovan Mitchell, and Evan Mobley to both stay healthy and level up when the stakes grow.

I’m an avowed fan of this team. The best-case scenario is something like what Boston went through, keeping a core together through some baffling upsets until the cards finally broke right and they won a championship. It’s hard to see a major move that would make this team better, but it’s also fair to wonder if the best players are good enough for a deep playoff run. Soon, we’ll find out.

Also, “Autopilot Destruction” would be a dope band name. I’m pleased with myself for that one.

That’s all for now! Hit me with any poems you’ve got rattling around in your head. Basketball gods know I’ve set the bar low.